just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize