My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
