Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
