I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
you would pick up someone in the library
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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