accomplished twins. life is a go
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
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