honey bunches of taint.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
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