its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
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