He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
