just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Randomize
