you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
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