dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
