I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
