If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize