I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
