Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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