i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
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His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
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I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
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