she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
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