He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
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