yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
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