and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Randomize
