Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize