did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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