Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
is that a dick in a sweater?
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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