Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
