Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
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