hell yes lets make some ravioli
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
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