walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
