The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
