Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
should my penis look like a turkey
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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