PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
