So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
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