the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
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