Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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