Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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