if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
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