if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
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