I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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