She went from zero to smokin in five shots
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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