dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
someone owes me an orgasm
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
