i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
