Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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