we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
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