I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Two words: blizzard sex
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
Randomize
