I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just invented taco cereal.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
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