he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
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