Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
