I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
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You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
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i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
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