I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Randomize
