i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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