Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize