wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
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